I recently discovered that I had "blogged" about my conversion into the Catholic Church long before I knew what blogging was about. My conversion story was posted online at Angelfire back in 2000. I wanted to share it with you so I am posting it here today. Enjoy!
"Be it done according to your will" ~Luke 1:38
June, 2000
Our family has decided to become Catholic. We haven't lost our minds, and we haven't lost our faith. Actually, we are still Christians who love God.
In fact, instead of losing anything, we have found that we have gained the "fullness" in our faith that Christ had intended for us to have. We have been called to follow closer to Him. It is something that we had hoped for, but never expected to find in the Catholic Church.
We never wanted to become Catholic. Of course, we held the popular misconceptions that are common in protestant denominations. We were convinced that it would only lead us to Hell. But after much research, and even more prompting from God, we have come to realize that "the whole truth and nothing but the truth" abides in the Roman Catholic Church. It is where we long to be. So we will attempt to explain this journey that God has been leading us on. The journey home.
We first became interested in the Catholic Church when Jim's brother married a devout Catholic. After he converted we decided to find out more about the church. I was searching for a new church home at the time and was studying the beliefs of different denominations. I was very discouraged to see hundreds of denominations, but could not find one that I felt was true to what the Bible taught. When I started studying Catholicism I was so intrigued with the teachings that seemed completely different from what I had always believed. The teachings did not seem to contradict the bible, but actually made since of many passages I had struggled with. There were some things that I could not understand intellectually, so instead of struggling with them I decided to run away from it all. I was afraid that if I believed in something that was not true, or not found in the bible, then God would be angry with me. So Jim and I decided to be Christians without a church home. Even though we didn't attend church regularly we were still interested in the Catholic Church and would go with his brother from time to time. We were being drawn to something we couldn't understand, and it was very frustrating. Eventually, in 1998, we decided to try RCIA to learn more. We attended a few sessions, but decided it wasn't for us. We still had too many obstacles to overcome. But by 1999 we were ready to give it another try. We only went to one session before we changed our minds again. At this time we were attending a local christian church and had become members there. We loved our church and were very active, but we were still being drawn to the Catholic Church. We had found so much truth there, even though we didn't understand everything. So we attended our christian church for about a year until sometime in May of 2000, when we finally decided that we had to become Catholic. Now that we have made this decision we are beginning a life-changing adventure. Let us share it with you.
Now that we have decided to become Catholic, we will need to start RCIA this fall. RCIA stands for Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults. We will talk more about RCIA later. First we would like to share exactly what it was that led us to the Catholic Church. What truth have we found that would convince us to convert? First, I believe one has to deal with the issue of authority. What is our authority as Christians? Many people believe it is the bible. I would agree that the bible is the inspired word of God and should not be disregarded; however, scripture(1 Tim. 3:15) itself says, "The church is the pillar and foundation of the truth." Christ established His church and there are many scriptures that support the fact that our authority lies within it. The problem with most Christians is simply rebellion. As we began to see this within our lives we also realized that the bible(Hebrews 13:17) says "Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves: for they watch for your souls, as they that must give account, that they may do it with joy, and not with grief: for that is unprofitable for you." Who are we called to obey?
We definitely did not want to have to be obedient to a pope. After reading the history of the Catholic Church I felt that several popes were not even Christians, let alone the Vicar of Christ. But does my opinion make it true? Let's look at some scripture. First, in Matthew 23:2-3, we see that the Pharisees had divine authority that they "inherited" from Moses. Now we know that they were not perfect, but what are we told here. "The scribes and the Pharisees sit in Moses' seat: All therefore whatsoever they bid you observe, that observe and do; but do not ye after their works: for they say, and do not." That was made pretty clear. So how do we know that the pope then has authority? Again, there are several verses to support this in scripture. In Matthew 16:18-19 we find "And I say also unto thee, That thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it. And I will give unto thee the keys of the kingdom of heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven." I have read every commentary available on this passage. The only one that makes sense is the one that states Peter was given authority here. When I asked my pastor what the binding and loosing meant in this verse he said, "They were given authority to forgive sins." I wondered then who has that authority today? Only one answer to that question. Even the fact that scripture is not our only authority is scriptural. In 2 Thessalonians 2:15 we read, "Therefore, brethren, stand fast, and hold the traditions which ye have been taught, whether by word, or our epistle." In fact we found so many verses that support the authority of the Church and the Pope that we could no longer be our own authority.
That was just the beginning of the truth that we found inside the Catholic Church. Although we didn't have the answers to all of our questions, we did realize that there is an authority who is responsible for leading us to the answers. I often thought of the verse in John 6 where Peter says to Christ, "Lord, to whom shall we go? Thou hast the words of eternal life." Peter and the disciples didn't understand what Jesus was saying in this verse and when asked if they would also leave as everyone else had, Peter responded in faith. He knew that he didn't have to understand God to follow Him. That's exactly how we felt. So in attempt to better understand we read the catechism which had answers to our questions. It was amazing! We had just studied worship in our Sunday School Class and the catechism started answering questions that were brought up in class. It was there the whole time, but we weren't looking. I thank God every day now for the answers we have, and the faith that is so much stronger. We will start RCIA this fall and by next Easter we will be Catholic. During our RCIA experience we will journal our experience online so that others can see what it is like. Maybe we can share what we learn with those who also question what the Catholic Church teaches. God bless!
Wow! So much has happened in the past few months. I am glad to have time to update our site. We had decided to take a detour for a few months and return to our old church. Actualy, I thought that I would stay there forever. I have to admit that my husband did not want to do this, and it was my unhappiness that led him to follow me there. I can only say that if you are going to read a book about the catholic faith make sure it is a good book to read. I am not going to name the title of this book, but by the time I finished reading it I was scared out of my mind. I could not be Catholic! I don't know why I believed what I read, but I know that I am glad to know that what I read doesn't have anything to do with what the Church truly teaches. Whew!!
So now I am preparing to start RCIA three weeks late, and hopefully I can convince my dear hubby that I am sincere enough to stick with it. If so, he will join me. If not, then he will wait a year before taking RCIA himself. He doesn't want to start it again and have to stop. It makes you a little stupid after a while. LOL.
Anyway, I think I have everything straightened out now, and please keep us in your prayers. We need all the help that we can get. I look forward to keeping this up to date with our RCIA adventure. Check back next Monday (Oct.2) to see how the first week went. God bless!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
October 2, 2000
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Our first night of RCIA was great! My husband and I are both glad that we are on the right track. Last night we talked about Scripture. We discussed the Catholic position on the interpretation of the Bible. There is a big difference between their position and the one we have always been taught, but not neccessarily believed. We were always told that everything in the bible is true and accurate. That there are no inerrancies, even when it comes to the science and historical facts.
When Jim began to study science in high school and in college he realized that science and biblical "facts" did not always jive. So he decided that if the Bible had mistakes, when he was told it didn't, then the whole thing was unbelievable. It was great to find that not everyone teaches that every part of the bible is always to be literally interpreted.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
October 9, 2000
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Our second night of RCIA was great as well. Tonight we discussed Faith. We learn so much each week we go. It is hard to share it here because it seems to be more of a heart knowledge than a head knowledge. It all is just making sense in my heart now and not just my head. That is awesome! I had too many stumbling blocks before and thought I couldn't go to RCIA until I was sure I wanted to be Catholic. However, I now see that RCIA really helps you to understand it in a different perspective. Not everything you learn is going to be "knowledge".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
October 16, 2000
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Well our next session of RCIA was just as great as the previous ones. Tonight we discussed the sacraments. I am so excited to know that I will receive the Eucharist at Easter. I used to wonder why I had to go through the year long process and think that I just could not wait. But Father Franks said something that really helped me to understand it. He said that when he is preparing people for marriage he likes to spend a year with them in preparation for the event. He explained that it means so much more to them when they go through that process. It makes the day so much more special. And that is how it is with our reception into the church. If we were just granted permission over a few weeks then it would not be as special to us. I think that is pretty neat. He also pointed out that in the early church the process of initiation took three years instead of one. I am grateful that I do not have to wait that long. Wow, this whole experience is really neat.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
October 23, 2000
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tonight we talked about baptism. We had a good time at RCIA. It seems we always pick up something new. It is nice just to be able to sit and talk with people. Everyone adds to the experience.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
October 30, 2000
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tonight we had a family dinner at RCIA. Jimmy thought it was neat that he finally got to find out what RCIA was. He has been staying with his grandpa on Monday nights. We had fun talking with others and getting to know them a little better.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
November 6, 2000
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tonight we talked about the Holy Spirit. We discussed the different symols that represent the Holy Spirit and what they mean to us. We talked about the gifts of the Holy Spirit and the fruits of the Holy Spirit.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
November 13, 2000
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tonight we discussed the Eucharist. Father Denis led the discussion and was in a very humorous mood. We laughed all night. I am very excited about receiving the Eucharist. I can hardly wait!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
November 20, 2000
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We had a night of prayer tonight. Next Sunday will be our Rite of Acceptance so we spent the evening in prayer and contemplation. We rehearsed for the event, and also had time for fellowship. It was a neat time. I am glad that we are coming into a new phase of RCIA. From now on we will leave during each mass to discuss the readings and what they mean to us. I think this will be a very exciting time!
January 20, 2001
It has been a while since I have updated our pages here, so I'll let you know how things are going. We are continuing in the RCIA process, and have a few months left. Jim's mom is still going as well. Hopefully by this Easter we will all be members of the Catholic Church. I personally have struggled with some of the teachings of the church, but have overcome this recently with much prayer and strength from above. I want to share something I read concerning the Immaculate Conception that was written by Cardinal John Henry Newman. He is a convert to the Church as well as a great theologian.
"Now I wish it observed why I thus adduce the Fathers and Scripture. Not to prove the doctrine, but to rid it of any such monstrous improbability as would make a person scruple to accept it when the Church declares it. A Protestant is apt to say: "Oh, I really never, never can accept such a doctrine from the hands of the Church, and I had a thousand thousand times rather determine that the Church spoke falsely, than that so terrible a doctrine was true". Now, my good man, WHY? Do not go off in such a wonderful agitation, like a horse shying at he does not know what. Consider what I have said. It is, after all, certainly irrational? is it certainly against Scripture? is it certainly against the primitive Fathers? is it certainly idolatrous? I cannot help smiling as I put the questions. Rather, may not something be said for it from reason, from piety, from antiquity, from the inspired test? You may see no reason at all to believe the voice of the Church; you may not yet have attained to faith in it--but what on earth this doctrine has to do with shaking your faith in her, if you have faith, or in sending you to the right-about if you are beginning to think she may be from God, is more than my mind can comprehend. Many, many doctrines are far harder than the Immaculate Conception. The doctrine of Original Sin is indefinitely harder. Mary just has not had this difficulty. It is no difficulty to believe that a soul is united to the flesh without original sin; the great mystery is that any, that millions on millions, are born with it. Our teaching about Mary has just one difficulty less than our teaching about the state of mankind generally. I say it distinctly--there may be many excuses at the last day, good and bad, for not being Catholics; one I cannot conceive: "O Lord, the doctrine of the Immaculate Conception was so derogatory to Thy Grace, so inconsistent with Thy Passion, so at variance with Thy word in Genesis and the Apocalypse, so unlike the teaching of Thy first Saints and Martyrs, as to give me a right to reject it at all risks, and Thy Church for teaching it. It is a doctrine as to which my private judgment is fully justified in opposing the Church's judgment. And this is my plea for living and dying a Protestant".
This quote comes from a work by Newman entitled "Memorandum on the Immaculate Conception". I find it to be very helpful when I doubt things that the Church teaches, to read what great saints have to say about the topic. This quote certainly helped me to understand the Immaculate Conception, along with other things that Newman wrote.
Stay tuned for how things go at our next RCIA meeting Monday January 22, 2001. God bless!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
January 22, 2001
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tonight Father Denis talked to us about the Sacrament of Reconciliation. We had a great time learning more about the grace of God and how wonderful this sacrament is. We can't wait to be able to experience it ourselves!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
January 29, 2001
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We learned more about the Sacrament of Anointing of the Sick and about Pastoral Care. We discussed ethics, right to life, and also where the Church stands on these issues.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
February 12, 2001
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Today we talked about purgatory. It wasn't what I expected. We were told that you don't have to believe in purgatory to be Catholic. I am too traditional to believe that. So now I am trying to remain calm and help others who are listening to this kind of teaching. God give me patience!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
February 19, 2001
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tonight we listened to Fr. Denis explain how we form a consience. We had many interesting discussioins concering moral decisions that we each have to make.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
February 26, 2001
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tonight we had a beautiful evening of prayer before our Rite of Election. The Rite is this Sunday, March 4. We are looking foward to the season of Lent as Easter is fast approaching.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
March 19, 2001
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I have missed a few weeks here again. Time sure does fly right by. We have been having a wonderful Lenten season. Right now we are also busy starting a local prayer cenacle under the Eucharistic Apostles of The Divine Mercy in our parish. The devotion of The Divine Mercy has been very special to us and we look foward to spreading this devotion to everyone we meet. Tonight we talked about the Sacrament of Reconciliation. We will be making our first confession soon. God Bless!
We are finally home! My husband and I joined the Church on Saturday April 14, 2001. Our son was baptized the following Sunday, April 22, Divine Mercy Sunday. I want to thank so many people for making this Easter the best one yet. First I want to thank my brother and sister-n-law for all of the prayer and support that they gave to us during this time, and most of all for putting up with us during the times that we struggled. I want to thank my sponsor, my husband's sponsor, and my mother-n-law's sponsor, for coming to RCIA every week with us. These three women are all sisters and have been such a great witness of how loving all Christians should be. I want to thank the priests and religious at our parish. And also all of the sponsors and members of the parish praying for us. I also want to especially thank our God and Father, His son Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit. The most Blessed Trinity is to be praised for ever and ever! Also I feel that I should thank the Blessed Virgin Mary for her role in our conversion. And our gaurdian angels who stood by to protect us from all who wanted to see us fail. I thank all the angels and saints in Heaven for their constant intercession for the souls on earth...may we always seek to do God's Holy Will!
